<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Soteria by maschoi (zaynandlouis)</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28060701">Soteria</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/zaynandlouis/pseuds/maschoi'>maschoi (zaynandlouis)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Monsta X (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Blasphemy, Blow Jobs, Character Study, Corruption, Dom/sub Undertones, M/M, Oral Sex, Relationship Study, Religious Guilt, Seven Deadly Sins, Smut, Worship</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 16:13:51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,097</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28060701</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/zaynandlouis/pseuds/maschoi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>james 1:14–15</p><p>but each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Im Changkyun | I.M/Yoo Kihyun</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Soteria</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>u can't teach an old dog new tricks, so here's one of my usual ones. loosely based on the world building in evil (on netflix, 9/10, would recommend) and the relationship between david and kirtsen. also pulling from divine comedy (10/10) and my own religious trauma (0/10). religious references will be a bit all over the place, think of this fic as non-denominational</p><p>tags will be updated as needed</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>timothy 2:22 </strong>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p></p><blockquote>
  <p>flee the evil desires of youth and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the lord out of a pure heart. </p>
</blockquote><p> </p><p>"and what do you think your mother would say?" changkyun asks, husky voice making it hard for kihyun to comprehend his words. he blinks, tries to think, to listen. "your father? would be able to stomach seeing you this way? would be vomit at your feet, at mine?" </p><p>kihyun is so dizzy, so lost. he feels the word <em>vomit </em>deep in his belly, stomach gurgling as if it's eager to act out any verb that falls from changkyun's lips. </p><p>"i," he tries. he breathes in so hard that his raw throat burns. "i can't think of him now." </p><p>"do you ever?" changkyun challenges. "the way you live your life, is it ever with your dear father in mind?" </p><p>eyesbrows knitting together, a sob escapes kihyun's mouth. his eyes burn. he wants to cry, to run, to die.</p><p>he feels like he's burning alive with humiliation and shame and wants the sweet relief of forgiveness, but knows committing himself to the afterlife will only find him more fire. hellfire. that is all he is promised after this existence, so what is the harm of being here, in changkyun's arms? can hellfire burn hotter if the sins of those who burn run deeper? does it burn deeper, into their bones, where their abominations settle? </p><p>kihyun swallows down the bile, the indignity of the reality he has created for himself, and speaks.</p><p>"who is my father to judge me, to judge us?" he meets changkyun's eyes, finally, "he is no less a sinner. he knows no more god's will than you or i." </p><p>a nasty, sick smile breaks onto changkyun's handsome face. his balmy skin contrasts so harshly with the bite of the smile, kihyun's chest aches. </p><p>"your father cannot judge me, kihyun. i don't even allow your god to. you aren't to be worried over his will, god's or your father's, but mine."</p><p>his name sounds sour in changkyun's mouth, like it doesn't deserve to be there. his skull hurts from trying to process the words. </p><p>“and what is your will?” he asks. tears are brimming his eyes, ready to flow at the first touch against his hot skin. changkyun gives him that, a rough palm against the side of his neck. a tear falls to meet the thumb pressing into his jugular. </p><p>perhaps if the will is given to him as a creed, his actions simply the following of instructions, he will escape some of the responsibility of them. perhaps the lessened responsibility will soften his eventual consequences. perhaps he just wants to listen to the man standing so tall in front of him, to follow his will without these selfish motivations. </p><p>regardless, he will follow it. the lust in his skull seems to be so fierce that it would not matter what his motivations are, what his morality screams for. as long as it is changkyun’s feet he bows to, he will bow. if it is changkyun’s hand, he will wield. if it is changkyun’s desire, he will return it tenfold. </p><p>his thoughts hurt, repetitive and mean in his head, and he simply wants to stop them. he wants to be free of them, to have no thought of himself or god, or his father. he knows only the man in front of him can provide such sweet emptiness to him. </p><p>changkyun begins to speak, and he goes limp under his touch. he submits to changkyun, the embodiment of his own lust. </p><p>there are more words spoken to him, but all kihyun hears is the command he is given. “pray.” </p><p>and so kihyun prays. </p><p>he drops to his knees from the edge of his lover’s bed, mourning the loss of changkyun’s hand on his skin. his neck is warm where it sat. </p><p>the floor beneath him is hard. changkyun is not a fan of anything warm or soft in his space. everything is hard, cold, dark. it fits, kihyun thinks. it matches the darkness of his damned soul, the cold he bleeds into kihyun’s waiting mouth, heart. </p><p>the hard is for kihyun’s knees, no rug to soften the blow of his sin. </p><p>he resists looking up at changkyun. he knows that is not a part of his prayer. </p><p>instead, he bows. he knees ache as he leans forward on them, can feel his sensitive skin pressing into the spaces between the hardwood slats under his own weight. it will leave pinched little lines, red and angry, reminders of his devotion to the false deity he is serving. </p><p>his forehead to the toes of changkyun’s boots, he waits. he holds his breath, listening, hands at his sides as he knows they should be. every breath he is forced to take is so loud in his ears. his tensed body thrums with anxiety, anticipation. </p><p>he’s listening for the soft sound of a button being popped open, a zipper being pulled down. sometimes it comes quickly, sometimes kihyun must be patient in his prayer. </p><p>changkyun must be worked up, hot from all the shame in the air. it always does get him hard. kihyun’s disesteem is his favorite aphrodisiac. </p><p>a shiver runs down kihyun’s spine when he finally hears the cold metal strain in changkyun’s fingers. he lifts his head. </p><p>his eyes cross, head swimming as he sits up far too quickly. he’s eager. no underwear, as always. hard, like the floor under him. warm, as he leans forward to press his cheek against it, so contrasting to the mood in the room that his stomach churns. he breathes out, breathes in.</p><p>thoughts of salvation melt away, melt into the hot pit of lust burning within him. it bubbles up his throat, spills from his mouth to engulf changkyun fully as he takes him between his chapped lips. his hands stay at his sides, obeying. </p><p>the weight on his tongue is heavy, the weight on his chest heavier still. the hand returns to the side of his neck, steadying him. </p><p>he prepares to hand himself over, to surrender. it’s heavenly, the first thrust of changkyun’s hips. it sends him to a cloud so high he thinks he could look down on god if only he could open his eyes. </p><p>changkyun’s thumb is back on his jugular, a threat as much as it is a promise. </p><p>the lust he feels is so pure he can’t imagine it to be dirty. clean, sacred, it is, a prayer he means with his entire flesh. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>comments r appreciated/encouraging !! also follow me on <a href="https://twitter.com/1percentis">twit</a> for more ck centric blasphemy</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>